I’ve been reading a book called The Power of the Powerless. I think I mentioned it in a previous post but just in case, it is basically the story of a couple whose son was born without the power to do anything but exist. Christopher De Vinck is the author and he received a lot of letters in response to the first publication of an article about his brother Oliver. It’s hard for me to try to make some points out of what I’ve been learning and thinking about because it is still very fluid and kind of mysterious to me…anyway, this is what I”ve got.
As I’ve been reading this book I’ve been thinking a lot about the kids that I work with in the hospital. It is hard to know how to feel. Sometimes I think about how much more capable they would be if they were in the States or why they are the ones that can’t walk, talk or respond to others instead of me. I used to think about all of that stuff a lot and get kind of sad, but then I read books like the Power of the Powerless and I start to think less about how their physical state is a result of living in a fallen world and more about how they are fulfilling their purpose on this earth. Their existence is simple and pure. To exist, love and be loved, and don’t be fooled, they are very capable, perhaps more capable than most of knowing, worshipping and exhibiting God. I have seen some of the immediate affects of being with people like Maria Louisa and Pedro. The most deep and pure joy is in the eyes of Maria Louisa and every time Pedro pulls on my neck and grabs my arms while I’m feeding him I understand how much I need God.
Those immediate affects have been really cool and I can honestly say that those kids bless me, but what Da Vinck talks about in his book is less of the immediate things and more of choosing a life of love, service and presence. That life teaches much deeper things. One of the things he writes about and received letters about was the power of making that choice of love, service and presence. The father of a boy named Anthony who, like Oliver, was incapable of nearly everything, said this, “ When we stopped trying to do other than accept him and bring him love, we brought Anthony home, relaxed, and said, ‘This is it. We can now take one day at a time.’” They chose a life of love. Da Vinck never pretends that it was an easy life but he does, through lots of stories and experiences, share a hard earned insight. Even though we may want more for all of the handicapped people of the world, it is entirely possible and perhaps probable, that they are serving God and fulfilling their purpose in life more fully then if they had a healthy body.
Before I go further know that I absolutely believe that God is capable of healing these kids and that might be in his plan for some of them. With that being said I have been thinking at length about simple acceptance of the physical state of my friends at the hospital. Maybe holding out hope that one day Gaspar and Sonia will be able to walk and talk normally is cheapening their present existence. In thinking that they should be something else I think that I am really thinking that their lives as they are are less valuable. Somehow we/I think that because their lives are so different from me they are somehow lacking. Talk about arrogant. In accepting the sorrowful we are not admitting that it is right but that it is reality and that there can be great gifts in accepting and entering in to that reality. Thomas Merton says it well in New Seeds of Contemplation,
“…no despair of ours can alter the reality of things, or stain the joy of the cosmic dance which is always there. Indeed, we are in the midst of it, and it is in the midst of us, for it beats in our very blood, whether we want it to or not.
Yet the fact remains that we are invited to forget ourselves on purpose, cast our awful solemnity to the winds and join in the general dance.”
Only when we enter into the situation can we offer and receive from our depths, and in that interaction change occurs. If Da Vinck had never bothered to spend time with his brother and just let him exist as a thing, he never would have arrived at such deep insights and both he and Oliver would have missed out on love between brothers. It was in that acceptance and the ensuing love that true life occurred. Perhaps the only change that needs to happen in situations like these is losing the desire for change.
I am still having a hard time putting words to the feelings and thoughts I”ve been having. I hope this has made some sense…I’ll finish with some quotes from the book and a few last thoughts.
From a letter from Nancy Pratico to Da Vinck about her son who is also severely handicapped.
“And someday, someone will come up with a way to help the Olivers and Anthonys of the world who, in the interim, will have to survive on the grace of love alone. And maybe that’s all there is.”
…Maybe that’s all there ever was and ever will be too. Love.
After being told by all the doctors that Anthony would die soon and to not get too attached his father said these things in telling their story.
“my philosophy all along was that I didn’t care how long Anthony would live. He was going to know the embrace of his father’s and mother’s arms.
“Many times I thought back then that it would be better if something happened, if Anthony died. I never think that anymore. I hold him a lot.”
“We survived. Anthony, the way he is, made me a better man. I enjoy my life a little bit more. I see things…..Anthony has brought us a special joy.”
I still feel like I’m hanging in the balance with these thoughts. They have yet to take root in me and grow into something more, some kind of lifestyle. But for now I cannot help but believe that, as you’ve read in these quotes, God is changing lives through the powerless. God has always seemed to have a thing for the powerless. It seems that he is with them. Maybe we should be with them too.
Go in peace, and chose love.
.adam.
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